


Abandoned

by actress4Him



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abandonment, Allura is mean, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Animal Attack, Apologies, Blood and Injury, False Accusations, Fantastic Racism, Fever, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Infection, Isolation, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith (Voltron) Has Abandonment Issues, Keith (Voltron) Whump, Keith (Voltron)-centric, Loss of Trust, Mild Gore, Panic Attacks, Self-Hatred, Solitary Confinement, Suicidal Thoughts, Trust Issues, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-27
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:07:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29738496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/actress4Him/pseuds/actress4Him
Summary: “Enough!” Allura’s voice rang out over everyone else. “Perhaps we cannot prove his true motives, but one thing is certain, he cannot be trusted. Coran, Lance, escort him downstairs to a cell. We will decide what to do with him at a later date.”---------------------------How the Galra reveal could have gone, if Allura and the team had reacted much worse. There will be a happy ending, but not before there's a lot of angst and whump.
Relationships: Keith & Shiro (Voltron), Keith & Voltron Paladins
Comments: 19
Kudos: 118





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, this is Day 8 and Day 29 from my Whumptober 2020. If you've read that already, sorry to disappoint, this isn't new content! I just thought since a couple of the prompts ended up having sequels and being regular fic length, I'd post them separately for those who didn't want to wade through all 31 days to find them.

“I’m...part Galra.”

“I...I’m sorry, what?”

Keith ducked his head and cut his eyes to the side to avoid looking at Allura. “The knife I got from my mom. It’s...something that every Blade carries. And the only way to activate one is to...have Galra blood.”

“And you activated yours?”

His eyes darted up to Coran’s unreadable expression and back down again. “Yes.”

“Wait, but that makes no sense,” Lance exclaimed, and Keith could imagine his hands flailing as he spoke. “He’s human. He’s obviously human.”

Hunk hummed in agreement. “Yeah, if he was part Galra you’d think there’d be some sign of it. Something...purple, or something, I dunno.”

“Or a little more height,” Lance snorted. 

Shiro’s hand dropped onto his uninjured shoulder, and he jumped. “Well, we don’t know for sure how much of him is actually Galra. Obviously he ended up with mostly human genes, at least when it comes to appearance.”

“Ah, but other than appearance...that actually explains so much about Mullet. Hot-headed, reckless, socially inept -”

Normally Keith would have snapped back by then, but he just drew his shoulders farther up toward his ears, arms crossed tightly across his chest as if he could keep himself from falling apart. It was Shiro who broke in for him.

“Lance, that’s enou-”

“When were you planning on telling us?”

The question took him so much by surprise that he jerked his head up, regretting it as soon as he saw Allura’s stony glare. “W-what?”

Sparks seemed to shoot from her impossibly blue eyes. “When were you planning on telling us your heritage, before this accidental reveal today? Sometime after you betrayed us, I suppose?”

Keith couldn’t seem to catch his breath. “No, n-...I didn’t know, I swear. This is...this is as much of a surprise to me as it is to all of you.” He knew the news wouldn’t be taken well, especially by Allura, though Coran, Shiro, and Pidge were next on the list. But he never expected to be accused of hiding it from them, of planning to betray Voltron. “I’m not...I would never…”

“Never what, turn on Voltron? If you’re really Galra, which I assume you wouldn’t lie about that, then it’s in your very nature.”

Shiro gave his shoulder a squeeze and spoke up. “Princess, as the person here who has known Keith the longest, I can assure you that what he says is true. He didn’t know until today.”

“And how would you know that?” she shot back. “How do you know that he hasn’t just been hiding it from you, like he has from all of us?”

“Because I know him.” Shiro waved a hand to include the others in the room. “We all know him! Right? We’ve been working alongside him all these months...he’s helped save so many people, including each of us! Regardless of whether he knew or not - which I still believe he didn’t - he’s a good person. Being part Galra doesn’t define him.” It was an echo of the words he had told Keith on the way back to the Castle. Keith still wasn’t sure that he believed them anymore than the rest of the room’s occupants.

Hunk was the first to reply, hesitantly. “I...I don’t know, man. I mean, I kinda really... _don’t_ know him all that well? I’d like to say I do, but…”

“But Mullet never really lets anybody get to know him.” Lance sounded much less hesitant, and more and more like he was siding with Allura. “He’s always so standoffish. I thought it was just because he was a jerk, but maybe it was because he was keeping a secret. Or because he was plotting to kill us all.”

Shiro gaped at him, flabbergasted. “Lance! You don’t really think that, do you?”

But he did. They all did, to some extent or another, Keith could see it. They all thought he was some kind of monster, and...maybe he was. 

Lance continued to defend his opinion, while Hunk waved his hands in front of his face and refused to give more of one. It was obvious from Shiro’s tone that he was growing not only frustrated, but desperate. Finally, he turned to the youngest member of the team, the only one who had yet to speak. 

“Pidge?”

A moment passed before she lifted her head, and Keith’s heart skipped a beat when those tear-filled but furious eyes met his. She opened her mouth and sucked in an audible breath before throwing her words like daggers. “Do you know where my family is?”

His stomach plummeted to the floor. “ _No,_ Pidge, I...of _course_ I don’t, I -” He couldn’t say anymore. It didn’t matter what he said, anyway, no one was going to listen to him. Pidge turned her eyes back to the floor, fists clenched by her sides, as the rest of the room devolved into chaos.

Shiro and Allura were shouting back and forth at each other, Hunk was trying to comfort Pidge, and Lance was shooting glares at him like he was the devil incarnate. Keith stood in the middle of it all with his hands fisted in his hair, wishing he could disappear. Wishing he could go back to that morning and never go to the base, wishing he could go back all the way to the beginning and never be born. It’d be better that way, right? A freak of nature like he was shouldn’t exist. If he’d never been born, then Voltron would have found another red paladin, one who wasn’t Galra, and they could carry on saving the universe without having to deal with this mess.

“Enough!” Allura’s voice rang out over everyone else. “Perhaps we cannot prove his true motives, but one thing is certain, he cannot be trusted. Coran, Lance, escort him downstairs to a cell. We will decide what to do with him at a later date.”

Keith went numb. Everything that happened from that moment on felt like he was watching a movie on a screen. Shiro fairly exploded, protesting Allura’s decision, but the princess pinned him to the nearest console and sneered something about him daring to usurp her authority. Cold, unfeeling hands latched onto both his arms, tugging him harshly toward the door. He walked in a daze.

The next thing he knew, he was standing in the middle of a spherical, blue-tinted forcefield, with no knowledge of how he had gotten there. Down a long walkway, Coran and Lance were disappearing into an elevator. The doors slammed shut on their backs. He was completely alone.

Alone, like he had been after his dad died when he was six. Alone, like he had been in nearly every foster home that followed. Alone, like when Shiro went to Kerberos and subsequently vanished. He thought that by now he’d be used to being alone. But he wasn’t. Not anymore. Not when he had spent the last few months surrounded by people, people whom he didn’t always get along with, but whom he had finally let himself begin to call friends. Not when he had thought he was finally figuring out what it felt like to belong somewhere.

Sinking to the floor, he bit back a hysterical laugh. He should have known better. Nothing good ever lasted in his life. No one but Shiro ever really cared about him, so why had he let himself think that these people did? Maybe Lance was right. Maybe it was all because he had been Galra all along. He had always been the weird kid, the outsider, the foster that nobody wanted, the troublemaker, the rebel. Anytime something good came along, he somehow drove it away. Shiro had spent a lot of time trying to convince him that it wasn’t true, that he wasn’t responsible for other people’s choices, but Keith had never quite believed him. If it wasn’t true, then why did trouble and sorrow seem to follow him everywhere he went? Even as an adult, even in quiznaking _space_ he couldn’t keep from messing up the good in his life.

He didn’t blame Allura for locking him up. Didn’t blame Lance for his glares, didn’t blame Pidge for her anger or Hunk and Coran for their silence. He wouldn’t trust him, either, if he was in their place. The Galra had ruined each and every one of their lives. Even if he knew that he would never, ever hurt his team...maybe he could take on some of the blame of his race. If punishing him made them feel better, then he’d take it.

Time dragged by in that tiny cell. He knew, because the lights in the cavernous room around him brightened and dimmed with the Castle’s cycles just like they did upstairs, and bowls of food goo emerged out of the ground twice per cycle. Maybe it was some kind of Altean science/magic, or maybe there was just a dispenser beneath the floor. He didn’t know, or care. He was glad to get the food, but the fact that he didn’t even get that tiny bit of interaction that someone bringing him a meal would give him hurt. It was like being in the desert shack all over again, but much worse. In the desert, he had the choice to go into town and see people if he wanted, and he had keeping himself alive and chasing after the Blue Lion to keep his mind occupied.

Here, he had nothing. His time was divided between eating, pacing the floor, doing pushups - one armed, since his shoulder still wasn’t healed - and situps, and lying on the hard bed, though he slept very little. 

He wasn’t sure what hurt more - the initial rejection and mistrust, or the lack of care now. No one even bothered to come down and ask him questions, to try to find out the truth, much less actually check on him and make sure he was okay. He wondered if they even looked at the security feed ever to see if he was even still alive. 

He knew what did hurt the most, though, more than both of those things combined. Shiro. Out of everyone, he thought that at least Shiro would come down at some point. The fact that he had so readily accepted Keith’s Galra heritage had baffled him, but he had been the only one trying to defend him. So where was he now? Were they preventing him from visiting somehow? Or had he changed his mind after all, and sided with the others?

In the end, it took them four quintants that felt like an eternity to decide his fate. The elevator doors opened late in the day, the sudden noise after so much silence startling. Keith swung his legs over the side of the bed and sat up quickly, trying not to be too disappointed when only Allura and Coran walked out. He supposed it was too much to ask that he could see all of his friends one more time. 

Stopping in front of the cell, Allura folded her arms in front of her while Coran crossed his in the back. Both were stoic, betraying no emotion on their faces. Allura, of course, was the one to speak.

“We’ve come to escort you off the ship.”

His stomach clenched, even though he hadn’t expected anything different. “Okay.”

“We have landed on a planet called Borulmyte. It is inhabited only by various primitive and non sentient species. The atmosphere is breathable and the climate livable for both humans and Galra.” The last word was said with no small measure of disgust. “There are plenty of edible plants and animals, so you should be able to survive just fine.”

Survive. That was the key word in all of this, wasn’t it? He had half expected not to survive, to be thrown out of an airlock into the cold vacuum of space. But now...surviving is all that he would be doing. Alone, again. He shouldn’t have expected anything different. Alone was apparently his destiny. Alone on a planet with no other sentient life, no one to interact with, no possible way of ever leaving. 

Surviving. No more living, those days were over. He wasn’t ever very good at that, anyway. Surviving was what he did best. How long, though, would he last? How long until he decided he was tired of surviving, when there wasn’t even anything left to survive for? Out in the desert, he had had the Blue Lion calling him, and the stubborn notion that Shiro wasn’t really dead. Now...he’d only have himself.

“This was certainly no easy decision, and much time, discussion, and thought has gone into choosing the proper planet. So I hope that you will cooperate and not cause a scene. Nothing you can say or do is going to change our minds now.”

For a moment, he let himself imagine those discussions. It certainly wasn’t the first time over the past few days he had done so. Did anyone advocate for him? Had Shiro been the one to insist that they make sure the planet was livable? Had they chosen a basically uninhabited place because they wanted to keep him safe from possible Galra rule, or because they wanted to keep locals safe from him? Had anyone voted for just throwing him out the airlock?

He nodded and stood. “Okay.”

An opening was made in the force field so that Coran could enter and lock his wrists into energy cuffs. Then he was escorted up the walkway, into the elevator for a completely silent ride, and out into the familiar front hall. It almost seemed like just yesterday that he and the others had crept cautiously through those towering doors, having no clue the adventures that were waiting for them inside. Now he was being figuratively thrown out the same doors onto a planet that was just as unknown as Arus had been then.

The light was dim when they exited, whatever sun might exist there already having set. They were in an open, desert like area, but a forest of some sort was nearby. At least he had options. He knew how to make his way in an Earth desert, but for food and shelter the forest might be his best option.

“This is where we leave you.” 

Coran stepped forward and removed the cuffs, and Keith absentmindedly rubbed at his wrists.

“Don’t suppose I get a communicator like our...your allies.”

Allura just stared at him with the same, unchanging expression. He ran a hand through his hair.

“Right. Listen, um...could you...give everybody a message from me? I was...hoping to get to say goodbye, but…”

Sighing heavily, Allura looked as if she was barely refraining from rolling her eyes. “I suppose that depends on what this ‘message’ is.”

“Um.” He looked down at his feet, scuffing the toes of his boot into the sand. “Tell...tell Hunk that I’ll...miss his cooking. Especially those brownies he made for me. And tell Lance that...I never hated him. He...annoyed me sometimes, but...he was a good friend, too.” 

He drew in a deep breath, trying to steady himself. “Tell Pidge…” He swallowed. “Tell Pidge that I hope she finds her family. I really, really do. And that she’s doing great with her bayard. I...kept meaning to tell her that, but never did.

“And Shiro…” His jaw tightened. There were so, so many things to say to Shiro. Things that he should have said long ago, things that he had said before but could never say enough. Things that he’d never get a chance to say again. He dashed errant tears away with the back of his hand. “Just...tell him I love him.”

He looked up finally, giving a wobbly half smile. Allura looked even sterner than before, though Coran’s mouth had twisted a bit to the side in an expression that Keith couldn’t read. “And thank you both, for letting me have the chance to fly Red. She’s...amazing.” One corner of his mouth lifted a little more. “Tell her I’ll miss her.”

A long, awkward moment passed before Allura cleared her throat. “Right, then. If that’s all…”

Coran seemed to shake himself out of his thoughts and pulled Keith’s knife out of his pocket. “We figured you might as well have this. It is yours, after all, and you’ll need it, I’m sure.”

Keith whispered his thanks as he gingerly took it from the man's hands.

“Alright. Well...farewell, Number Four.” Coran gave a little salute, Allura a curt nod, and they turned their backs to walk back up into the Castle.

Once they were gone, Keith stayed rooted in place, unable to make himself move. It was only when the Castle rumbled to life that he took a few unsteady steps backwards. The place that he had come to call home over the past few months lifted from the ground before shooting off into the sky. Keith tipped back his head and watched until it was no more than a speck, blending in with the stars that had begun to come out, refusing to let the tears that burned at his eyelids fall.

There was a pretty good chance that none of his messages would ever get relayed. He hoped they would, but knew that he’d never find out one way or the other. He’d never see any of those he thought were his friends again.

He was alone.

All that was left to do now was survive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I greatly appreciate any and all comments! I've been told by several people that this chapter made them cry, so you can let me know if you joined their ranks. Part 2 is coming soon!
> 
> If you'd like to buy me a coffee, go to https://www.buymeacoffee.com/actress4Him


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much, everyone, for the kudos, bookmarks, and kind comments! I'm glad you enjoyed the first chapter. Now it's time for the conclusion (which, btw, is over 3x longer than chapter 1. I kinda went crazy, but I wanted to make sure to end it right). 
> 
> Most of the tags apply to this chapter, so check over those again if you need to.
> 
> Enjoy!

It had been nearly a week since they abandoned Keith. Discarded him, like garbage. Dropped him off on some deserted planet like some people back on Earth used to drop off animals that they didn’t want to have to take care of. 

Shiro had always hated those people. Now he was one of them.

Except _worse_ , because this wasn’t a puppy they had dumped on the side of the road, this was a hu-...okay, well only _partly_ a human being, but a _person_ , nonetheless. The person that he had seen as the little brother he never had for the past several years that he had known him. The person that he had sworn, even if only internally, to look after, always.

And sure, it wasn’t like it was _his_ idea, but he had still let it happen. Yeah, if he had tried to fight it, Allura probably would have locked him in his room and done it without him. But he should have fought anyway. He should have let them drag him away like they had Keith that day they found out he was part Galra. Maybe they would have thrown him in a cell, too. Maybe then he’d actually be able to look at himself in the mirror now.

They wouldn’t have, though. He was human. He was _trustworthy._

So trustworthy that he had turned his back on his brother, all for the sake of Voltron and the universe. 

That was the lie he had been telling himself, the one thing that had kept him from jumping in his Lion and going after Keith for days. The universe needed Voltron. Therefore, the universe needed him. He was the leader of Voltron, he couldn’t just abandon the rest of the team and disobey the Princess’ orders for the sake of one man. Being a defender of the universe meant having to make sacrifices and hard choices.

And maybe all of that was actually true, but it was only half the story. _Keith_ needed him. As the leader of Voltron, he should be setting an example for the rest of the team to follow, and should be able to make decisions for the good of _every_ team member without being threatened and overruled by the Princess. Being a decent person who could live with his own choices meant not going against his own promises and ideals.

He knew all of that. But both sides seemed true, and which side seemed more important changed by the second. 

To top it all off, the team had practically fallen apart since leaving Borulmyte. Not only were they down a Paladin, unable to form Voltron, but hardly anyone was speaking to each other unless forced. Allura was sulking because her father’s Lion wouldn’t accept her. Hunk, who had never seemed all that happy with the idea of kicking Keith out, seemed depressed. Pidge had pretty much locked herself in her room, he assumed furiously searching for any sign of her family. Lance was, as always, hard to get a read on, but he was noticeably quiet and stoic whenever he happened to appear. Coran had barely spoken a word the whole week.

And Shiro? He couldn’t stand to be around any of them. _They_ were the ones who had done this to Keith. Sure, a couple had made weak arguments on his behalf at the beginning, but in the end they had all caved to Allura’s wishes and turned on him. He blamed them just as much as he blamed himself for sitting here in the comfort of the Castle while Keith...who even knew? At the very least he was alone and probably scared, even though he’d never admit that. At the worst, he could be struggling to survive, dying at that very moment, and none of them would ever know.

Whichever it was, he didn’t deserve it.

Coran had called a meeting on the bridge for something he said was urgent. It was probably another distress call, though the last one - the only mission they had attempted that week - had gone so terribly that Shiro wasn’t sure if they should even bother trying again. Running a smooth, successful mission is awfully difficult when no one wants to speak to each other, much less work in sync.

Usually he was the first one to arrive for meetings like this. Well, except for maybe Keith, but that wasn’t a thought he wanted to dwell on right then. This time, when he finally dragged himself to the bridge, the others were all already there, though none of them looked happy about it. Unlike in the past, when he always tried to keep up everyone’s morale by being focused and enthusiastic himself, no matter how he actually felt, now he didn’t bother. Crossing his arms, he let his face rest in exactly the scowl he was feeling.

“What is this about, Coran?”

“Yes, I would like to know as well.” Allura’s brow was furrowed, clearly not happy at being left out of the loop. 

The orange-haired adviser wrung his hands, staring down at the floor. “Well, it’s...this is difficult to say. But…” Drawing in a deep breath that puffed out his chest, he finally looked up, catching each of their gazes. “I’ve been keeping something from you. It’s about Number F-...Keith. It’s about Keith.”

Keith’s name had practically become forbidden, so of course it automatically caught everyone’s attention. Shiro unfolded his arms and stepped forward. “What about Keith?” he demanded.

Coran’s eyes darted back to the floor. “He gave us messages to pass on to each of you. Before we left Borulmyte.”

“ _Coran!_ ” Allura hissed.

“ _No,_ Princess.” The response took everyone in the room by surprise, including Allura if the expression on her face was any indication. None of them had ever heard Coran speak that way to her, especially not to tell her no. He took another breath and seemed to steel himself. “You know that I have always served the royal family willingly, and that I see you like a daughter. I would follow you anywhere. However...you are still young. A great burden has been placed on your shoulders, and you have done extraordinarily well with it. But sometimes you make mistakes, and this, my dear...this has been a grave mistake.”

She narrowed her eyes. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that we never should have left the boy behind. Galra or not, he has never proven himself anything but the most loyal of paladins, and yet we have punished him for a crime he did not commit.”

Shiro was torn between feeling relief that someone besides him was saying it, and anger that it hadn’t been said sooner. “Why didn’t you speak up when I was trying to convince them all of this same thing days ago?”

Coran flashed him a guilty expression. “Because I was too much of a coward. I didn’t want to speak against my Princess, even though I knew what she was doing was wrong.” Squaring his shoulders, he looked around at the other paladins again. “But regardless of what anyone else thinks or decides, I can do this. I can fulfill the boys’ last request before he was left behind.”

Something in Shiro’s gut twisted at that statement, and he could see some shuffling of feet and shifting of positions around him that pointed to the others feeling the same way. No one liked to be reminded of what they had done.

“Fine,” Allura finally spat. “Do what you must to clear your conscience.” She crossed her arms and leaned back against the console with a huff.

“First to Number Two...Hunk.” Coran gave the Yellow Paladin a gentle smile. “He wanted you to know that he would miss your cooking, especially the brownies you made for him.”

That was all it took for Hunk to start crying, though he said nothing in reply.

“Lance, he said to tell you that he never hated you, that you annoyed him sometimes but were a good friend, too.”

If Shiro hadn’t been intently watching, he might have missed the way Lance’s eyes widened before he ducked his head and scuffed his sneaker into the floor.

“Pidge, your message was that he really, really hopes you find your family. And that he kept meaning to tell you he thinks you’re doing great with your bayard.”

Her eyebrows pulled in tight at the first part, but at the second she blinked as if surprised and looked away.

“And besides his message to the Red Lion that he would miss her, and to us, thanking us for the opportunity to fly her…” He turned to stare at Allura for that, and she couldn’t hold his gaze, either… “That leaves you, Shiro.”

The other messages had already left him ripped open, so he wasn’t really sure how he was supposed to handle one meant just for him.

Coran lips pursed into a sad smile. “‘Just tell him I love him.’”

He felt as if all the walls came crashing down on him all at once. He loved him. Of course he did, he _knew_ he did, they had always treated each other like brothers. But he had never said it. And now he had, and it was after Shiro had allowed him to be kicked out of the place they had all come to see as a home.

Spinning on his heel, he marched toward the door without a word.

“Shiro, wait, where are you going?”

If it had been any of the others, he might have just ignored them. But it was Hunk, so he at least threw the answer over his shoulder. “I’m going to get Keith.”

“Shiro -!”

“ _No!_ ” This time he whirled around, sending all of his fury in a glare toward Allura. “I’m _done_ letting you tell me how I should treat my little brother! I am going to get Keith, not the _Galra,_ but our _friend_ , the Red Paladin, the strongest and bravest and most loyal _person_ I know, and _no one_ is going to stop me! If you don’t want us back here, fine. I don’t care. Find yourself new Red _and_ Black Paladins. But I won’t leave him down there a second longer.”

It was unclear whether Allura even knew what to say to that, but before she had the chance Hunk piped up again. “I’m coming with you! Erm, if...that’s okay.”

Shiro spared him a small smile. “Of course it is.”

No one said anything as they left the room. Hunk jogged a little to catch up to Shiro’s long, quick strides before matching his pace. 

“I was a coward, too, like Coran said. Which, you know, isn’t really anything new, just...me being a coward isn’t usually at the expense of one of my friends. I was scared, to start with. Of him being, you know. Galra. But that’s stupid, really. Galra Keith is still Keith.”

“Yeah. He is.” He just hoped he was still Keith, still whole and well and not irrevocably changed, when they got to him. “I was just as much of a coward as anyone else, or more. I let the duty I felt to Voltron and the universe get in the way of the way I actually wanted to act. I should have gone after him right away.”

Hunk hummed in understanding. “Well, at least you actually stood up for him.”

They stopped off in their rooms to change into armor, then headed for Black and Yellow’s hangars. The long way, since they didn’t want to risk going back to the bridge and running into everyone else. Shiro had debated whether or not he should take Black, or just a pod, but decided that even if Allura wouldn’t let them stay, returning Black would give everyone a good chance to see Keith again and _really_ make sure they wouldn’t change their minds.

“Since we don’t have a wormhole, it’s gonna take us a while to get there,” he told Hunk over the comms once they were situated in their Lions and starting to take off.

_“I don’t mind. Just...how are we gonna find him once we’re there? I mean, he could have traveled a ways from where we...you know, left him.”_

_“I can track his quintessence.”_ The new voice took him by surprise, but not nearly as much as spinning around to find Green and Blue hovering over the Castle. _“But I’ll have to be pretty close_ _to him first. So we’ll still have to fly around for a while to try to catch a signal, then we’ll be able to narrow it down to a smaller area.”_

Shiro was too shocked by their appearance to come up with a reasonable response, so he just ended up echoing, “We?”

Lance’s solemn face popped up on a video screen in front of him, followed by another with Pidge’s. _“Yeah, we,”_ he said, mouth set in a firm line. _“We’ve been stupid, and we wanna fix it. If...if we can.”_

Clenching his jaw, Shiro sighed. “That’ll be up to Keith, I suppose. What kind of shape he’s in, and...whether he’ll forgive us.”

_“We don’t really deserve it,”_ Pidge mumbled.

“No, we don’t. But let’s go ask for it anyway.”

They talked a little as they flew. It was quiet, and a bit awkward, but it was more than they had talked all week. Lance admitted that he had been having doubts ever since they left, memories of time spent with Keith haunting his thoughts. The message had just sealed the deal.

Pidge shrugged when asked about her change of heart, and quietly conceded that she didn’t think she had ever really believed he was a bad guy. She was just hurting, and he had been the perfect target to take it out on. Her desperation to find her family had blinded her.

They were several hours into a trip that Hunk calculated would take a few days when a wormhole appeared in front of them, seemingly out of nowhere. Every Lion pulled up short, exclamations of surprise echoing across the comms. 

Shiro jerked his Lion around to find the Castle looming behind them. His immediate thought was that Coran had somehow taken over and caught up with them, but Coran couldn’t make wormholes.

“...Allura?”

Her voice over the comms was more tentative than he thought he had ever heard it. _“I have not yet decided to trust him. But I...I have seen how passionate all of you are about this, and I am...willing to reconsider my original stance.”_

It wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but it was more than he had expected. He’d take it. 

“Alright guys. Let’s go bring our boy home.”

The sight of the planet Borulmyte made Shiro’s stomach turn a flip. This was it. This was the place where Keith had been living for the past week. He couldn’t even imagine what it had been like for him. Allura and Pidge had done extensive research on multiple planets before deciding that this was the best one, and they had had plenty of “reassuring” things to say about it. He had always wondered, though, what they weren’t saying. Or what their research hadn’t turned up. There was no way that they could have known _everything_ there was to know about a planet just from reading about it. “Livable conditions” didn’t mean _enjoyable_ conditions.

_“Coran and I will stay here with the Castle. Keep us updated.”_

Shiro gave a nod. “Pidge, how close do you need to be to pick up Keith’s quintessence?”

_“Within a few miles.”_

“Alright. We’ll start at the drop off point. I’m gonna guess he would have headed east, into the forest, to find shelter.” That was the one reassurance he had about the whole situation, knowing that Keith was trained in survival skills. “We’ll head there first, and take it mile by mile.”

It took them the rest of the day. Only a fraction of that time had passed when Shiro started to run every possible horrible scenario through his mind of _why_ they weren’t finding it, even though he knew that they probably just hadn’t hit the right spot yet. 

_“There!”_ Pidge shouted. _“I’ve got it!”_

Relief flooded Shiro down to his toes. “Alright. Mark this location. We’ll have to go land in the desert and fly back in the Green Lion. She’s the only one small enough to fit in that little clearing over there. 

The little clearing, as it turned out, was around a creek that seemed to be clear and safe. His relief grew just a little more. If Keith had managed to end up this close to a water source, then maybe he was doing okay.

“Okay, Pidge. Lead the way.”

Hiking through the woods took almost another full day. A day in which the sun never actually rose. He hadn’t paid attention to start with, when they were still flying, because constant darkness outside had become the new norm, but now that they were on solid ground it was painfully obvious that they had yet to see light this entire time. And the temperature gauge on his helmet display was _mu_ _ch_ lower than he wanted it to be. Livable? Yes. Comfortable without armor? No. He wanted to interrogate Allura and Pidge on whether they knew about this when they had chosen to send Keith to this planet, but it wasn’t the time. He had to focus on finding Keith, nothing else.

After hours and hours of walking by only the flashlights built into their helmets, during which time no one, not even Lance, dared to complain, there was finally a spike on Pidge’s quintessence tracker. 

“Over here!” she shouted, taking off at a sprint through the underbrush. 

The others followed, swatting branches and bushes out of their way. Any second, Shiro expected to run into Keith. Maybe sitting in whatever hideout he had found, or out hunting for food in the never-ending darkness, his eyebrows flying up in surprise when he saw them all rushing in.

Instead, when he stumbled to a halt beside Pidge, she was staring at the ground, and there was no Keith in sight. 

“Pidge? What is it?”

Lifting a shaky finger, she pointed. Even before he looked, Shiro could feel his chest tightening with anxiety. And for good reason, too. The stain that was illuminated on the dirt and leaves was dried, at least a couple of days old, but it was undeniably blood. It was also concerningly large, and with the quintessence tracker crackling louder than they had heard it so far, there was no getting around the fact that it belonged to Keith.

Hunk immediately began babbling his worries, but Shiro’s heart was pounding too loudly in his ears for him to comprehend what he was actually saying. For a long moment he just stared at the bloodstain. It wasn’t until Lance stepped in closer to speak that he was broken out of his trance.

“Shiro? Do you think he’s…”

“No.” Yes. He didn’t know. It was a lot of blood. But he wouldn’t allow himself to believe that Keith was anything but okay until he saw him with his own eyes. “Pidge, is there a trail?”

She tore her eyes away to look at the screen, pacing back and forth a bit before nodding wordlessly and taking off through the bush. If her steps were a bit quicker now, no one blamed her. They just picked up their pace, too, solemn and silent other than Lance quietly updating Allura and Coran on what they had found. 

Every once in a while, a small patch of dark red on a leaf or tree trunk would catch Shiro’s eye. He tried to take it as a good sign. If Keith had been able to pick himself up from whatever had happened and trek through the woods, then maybe he wasn’t too bad off. At the time. Two or more days later? It was impossible to say.

The walk from there only took a few minutes, but it felt like an eternity. Finally, _finally,_ he spotted a small cave over the top of Pidge’s head, just as the tracker grew in volume and Pidge broke into a run. 

“Keith? _Keith!_ ”

He was right on her heels, barreling through the opening, terrified of what he would find. And what he did see was almost exactly what he had feared - Keith, his skin far too pale under their flashlights, lying completely still on the ground next to the cold, charred remains of a campfire. There were rough slashes in his t-shirt, through which bloody scabs could be seen, and his right leg was almost entirely wrapped in large blue leaves tied off with what looked like dried grass. It didn’t take much guesswork to figure out that the sporadic dark stains on the leaves were blood.

“ _Keith._ ” Shiro was by his side without really knowing how he got there, sliding down onto his knees next to the unmoving figure. “No, no, no, no, _Keith,_ come on, don’t _do_ this to me.” He carded his hand through the messy black hair. “Keith, _please._ ”

Pale lips parted, and a groan spilled out. Shiro nearly fell over with relief. Somewhere behind him, Lance was exclaiming his own relief in Spanish, while Hunk hovered just over his shoulder. Keith’s forehead, which he now noticed was coated in a sheen of sweat, furrowed, and he turned his head slightly to face Shiro before squinting his eyes open.

“Go ‘way,” he rasped, taking all of them by surprise. “‘re not real.”

“Yeah, yeah we are, buddy.” He stroked his hair again, then yanked off his glove so he could lay his flesh hand against his cheek, trying not to wince at the heat that met his touch. A fever. Whatever that wound was on his leg, it had probably gotten infected. No wonder he didn’t think they were real. “Doesn’t this feel real?”

Keith seemed to consider this, his brain probably having to work twice as hard as usual to process anything. Finally there was what seemed to be acceptance in those glazed eyes, but instead of seeming happy or confused or surprised or any of the emotions that they might have expected, he simply let his head roll back to the side and closed his eyes. “Come to...finish me off?”

“What? Keith, _no_ , why would you think that?” Hunk exclaimed, dropping down right next to Shiro. “We came to take you _home._ ”

“We’ve, uh...we were really terrible to you. It was really, really wrong,” Lance joined in.

Pidge shuffled her feet awkwardly. “Yeah. We, um. We want you to come back.”

“Even Allura is willing to reconsider, but whatever she decides, we're getting you out of here.” Shiro took one of Keith’s hands in his own and squeezed. “I never should have let her dictate how you were treated to start with.”

Silence fell for a moment. Keith cut his eyes up toward Shiro, not moving his head. “Knew you weren’t real.”

Pidge gave an exasperated grunt. “ _Keith -_ ”

“Don’t worry about it right now.” Sliding his glove back on, Shiro straightened and got ready to pick Keith up bridal style. “He’s burning up with an infection. We’ll have to talk to him later, once he can actually comprehend what’s going on. For now let’s just get him back to the Castle and into a pod.”

Shiro scooped Keith up gently into his arms, causing him to cry out when his leg was jostled. “I’m sorry, bud,” he whispered. “You’re gonna be okay.” He didn’t at all like how light he felt, nor how gaunt his face looked. It had only been a week, but it didn’t seem like he had eaten much in that time.

Now that they knew where they were going, the walk back to the Green Lion went by quickly. Pidge flew them back to their own Lions, with Hunk and Lance towing Black to the Castle so that Shiro could stay in Green’s cargo hold with Keith. He didn’t want to let him go, couldn’t even keep his eyes off of him. He was too afraid that if he looked away, he would be gone, would succumb to his infection or perhaps just vanish into thin air. In the better lighting of the Lion, Keith looked all the more pale and feverish, his breaths coming shallow as he mumbled unintelligible words and occasionally whimpered with pain.

“What kind of injuries are we dealing with here, Number One?”

Shiro barely remembered arriving at the Castle and exiting the Green Lion, but there he was, standing next to Coran and a stretcher. Tenderly, he settled Keith down onto the padded surface. “Not sure. Maybe an animal attack of some kind? I haven’t been able to get a look at his wounds yet. He’s got a fever for sure, though, so they’re probably infected.”

Coran’s face turned grim. “That’s unfortunate. We won’t be able to put him into cryosleep until his temperature is back to normal.”

Gritting his teeth, Shiro found Keith’s hand and held it as they walked toward the infirmary. Poor kid just couldn’t catch a break. He didn’t deserve any of this. And now it sounded like when he was back to himself, they were going to have to go back through a whole three years’ worth of self-esteem boosting...maybe even more. He let out a long sigh. It seemed like he had _just_ finally convinced Keith that he was worth loving, that he was important, that not everyone in his life was going to abandon him. 

Then he sat back and let _everyone in his life_ abandon him.

Coran sucked in a loud breath through his teeth as he peeled back the crude leaf bandages. “Yes, this is most certainly infected. And I would say that your animal attack hypothesis is correct. These look mostly like tooth marks. Quite deep.”

It looked mostly like a mangled, bloody mess to Shiro. His stomach turned, not just from the smell of the infection, and he was glad that Hunk wasn’t there at the moment. “What do we need to do?”

“Well, I’ll need to clean these. You might want to hold him down for that part.”

Keith bucked and writhed under Shiro’s hands as Coran poured antiseptic over his leg, screaming in agony. Shiro was pretty sure his heart was permanently residing in his throat now. He whispered reassurances, hardly knowing what he was saying, well aware that Keith probably couldn’t hear or comprehend any of it. 

After a thorough cleaning, Coran wrapped the leg in clean bandages and pulled a thin sheet up over his waist. Shiro sank into the bedside chair, relieved beyond words that the worst part was over. They spoke very little as they went about the rest of the work that needed to be done, Coran handing Shiro the antiseptic and a clean cloth so that he could work on the claw marks across Keith’s chest, then focusing himself on preparing an IV bag of antibiotics and nutrients. Shiro gently smoothed adhesive bandages over the cuts when he was done. When he looked up, Coran was sliding the IV into place in the back of Keith’s hand.

“That should do it for now. I’m going to get a cool, wet cloth to help bring his fever down, but he should recover just fine.”

It was only then that Shiro finally allowed himself to dissolve into tears, like he had been wanting to ever since finding Keith in that cave. Burying his face in his hands, he let the tears soak his cheeks and the sobs wrack his body, uncaring for once that someone was there to see him fall apart.

A sturdy hand landed on his back, rubbing soothing circles. “There, there, lad. I know it’s been a rough few quintants, but it’ll be alright.”

“Will it?” Shiro scrubbed at his face with his flesh hand. “You should have seen him, Coran. I don’t know if he’ll ever be able to trust any of us again.”

The adviser heaved a sigh. “I don’t know, either. I’m not sure if _I_ would be able to trust us, if the roles were reversed. But perhaps, with time, we’ll be able to prove to him that we do, indeed, care for him.”

Once Shiro had cried himself out, Coran convinced him to go change out of his armor and possibly get something to eat. He was surprised to find all three of the other paladins sprawled out on the floor just outside the infirmary, remnants of snacks scattered around them and expectant looks on their faces.

“Well? Is he...okay?” Pidge asked tentatively.

Shiro sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Physically, it seems so. He’s stable for now, at least, and Coran thinks he’ll be fine. We just have to make sure his fever doesn’t get too high.”

They all nodded slowly, seeming lost in thought. He imagined they were all thinking about the “other than physically” part that he had failed to comment on.

Hunk cleared his throat. “Is he awake?”

He shook his head. “He’s been in and out, but he’s resting pretty peacefully for now.”

“We didn’t want to, you know, be in the way,” Lance supplied. “But you can let us know when it’s okay for us to see him. Or we can take turns watching out for him.”

“Alright. I’ll let you know.” Right now he couldn’t imagine leaving his side, not for longer than he was doing right now. As he started down the hall again toward his quarters, he met another unexpected presence - Allura, lurking just around the corner from where the paladins sat, looking abnormally anxious. He stopped abruptly, not sure he was ready to see her again yet.

“I heard your update,” she stated after a moment of awkward silence. When Shiro said nothing in return, she pursed her lips. “I suppose we have some more discussions ahead of us now.”

“No. We don’t.” Allura’s eyebrows flew up in surprise, but he didn’t give her time to respond. “There’s nothing to discuss. Either you accept Keith back as the Red Paladin... _and_ treat him just as well as the other paladins, or he and I leave. Whether or not the others stay is up to them.” 

Allura’s brow furrowed, and she dropped her gaze to the floor with nothing else to say. Pushing past her, Shiro continued to his room, hurrying through changing so he could be back with Keith.

.o.0.O.0.o.

They would tell Keith later that he had been out of it for around two days before the fever broke. All he knew was that he woke up in the infirmary of the Castle with no memory of how he had gotten there, and assumed he must have been hallucinating again. He was actually a bit surprised that the wounds from that death beast hadn’t killed him yet...or maybe they had. Maybe this was some sort of purgatory or something, though the infirmary seemed like a strange choice.

It made a bit more sense when he turned his head to the right and saw Coran sitting there studying him. Seemed maybe he was going to have to face people he had failed in life before he could move on to whatever came next.

“Are you with us this time, my boy?”

Wrinkling his eyebrows at the strange question, Keith licked his dry lips with an equally dry tongue and tried to come up with something to say, but all that came out was a raspy, “What?”

Immediately Coran went into action, producing a hydration pack from somewhere nearby and holding the straw up to Keith’s lips. The cool liquid hit his throat like a slice of heaven, and he gulped greedily.

“Not too fast, now. Don’t want you making yourself sick.”

Keith nearly whined when the straw was pulled away, but he could already feel the liquid sloshing around inside of him, so it was probably for the best. Clearing his throat, he decided he could try talking again. “What am I doing here?”

“You were in pretty bad shape when the others found you. Something had torn your leg all up, and it had gotten infected. We couldn’t put you in a cryopod until your fever went down, which it seems it now has.”

His eyes darted around the cavernous white room. “So...this is real?”

The corner of Coran’s mouth tilted up. “Yes. It’s real.”

He had kinda suspected after the water. But that left one major question…“Why?”

Before Coran could respond, the door slid open, and Keith turned his head to see Shiro enter the room. The sight of his surrogate brother had him torn between happiness and a strange sense of dread, leaving him to clench the sheets in his fists and wait for some kind of reaction to come. Half of him expected it to be disgust, or anger, or maybe just an apathetic announcement of what his new punishment for existing was to be. 

Instead, Shiro’s face lit up with a happy, almost hopeful expression. “Keith?”

“Wait, is Keith awake?” another voice called from the hallway behind him. Lance’s head poked through the doorway, making Keith’s stomach clench, before he turned and yelled back down the hall. “Hey guys, Keith’s awake!”

All at once the infirmary was filled with almost all the people who hated him, all crowding around his bed and staring down at him with faces he couldn’t read. They were going to hurt him. He knew they would, why else would they have brought him back here? Obviously they had changed their minds and decided they had been too lenient. What were they going to do to him? How much pain would he be in now?

He couldn’t breathe. Suddenly it felt like that beast was sitting on top of him again, crushing his chest, and he struggled to draw in air through an open mouth while tears stung his eyes. His hands shook where they were still gripping the sheets. People were talking, but it sounded as if his ears were stuffed full of cotton and he couldn’t make out any of the words.

He almost didn’t notice when the crowd above him dispersed, but it did help his breaths start to come a little easier. Only there was still Shiro, and he still didn’t know where Shiro stood on any of this. The Black Paladin sat down next to the bed and tried to grasp his hand. Keith yanked it away.

“Don’t...don’t.”

“Okay. I won’t touch you. Do you know where you are?”

Of _course_ he knew, that was the whole problem. “Yes.”

“Okay. You’re safe now, Keith.”

_Safe._ Yeah, right. There was no such thing as safe, not anymore. He had thought the Castle was safe, that these people were safe, but he had been wrong. “Why?”

Shiro looked at him in mild confusion before choosing what to say. “We made a mistake, leaving you there. We -”

Keith rolled away, tucking his hands up next to his chest, cringing at the pain that still radiated through his leg. He didn’t want to hear it explained, how they wanted to punish him further. Yet at the same time, he needed to know what was coming. 

“Keith…”

“Now?”

It had been a long time since Shiro had needed to interpret his one word sentences, but luckily it seemed he was still good at it. “Now you keep resting and getting better until we can put you in a pod for your leg.”

“Why?”

That one seemed to give him pause. “So...you’ll be well.”

Were they really going to prolong the torture like this? Make him get well before they did away with him? He curled up tighter. “Just...kill. Now.”

“ _Kill?_ Keith -”

“ _Please._ ”

The chair scraped across the floor, and Keith flinched. Footsteps came around the bed. He tensed, waiting for the blow. The air in front of his face stirred, and Shiro’s voice came from very close.

“Keith, can you look at me, please?” When he didn’t comply, Shiro put a hand on his fists and pulled them down so that they were face to face. “No one is going to kill you. No one is going to _hurt_ you. You’re back on the Castle because we were _wrong._ They were wrong about you being untrustworthy, and I was wrong about my duty to Voltron being more important than my duty to you. I’m so, so sorry that I let them kick you out, and that I didn’t come after you sooner. You will _always_ be more important to me than the rest of the universe. You’re my brother. I _love_ you.”

Tears welled up in Keith’s eyes despite his reluctance to believe any of it. Tugging his hands out from under Shiro’s, he covered his face again, unable to respond.

Shiro let out a long, quiet sigh. “The others want to apologize, too, at some point. But for now you should try to get some more rest. You’re still recovering from the infection.”

He didn’t _want_ to sleep. He didn’t trust that he wouldn’t be messed with while he was asleep. But his body decided for him that it was ready, drifting off without his permission.

.o.0.O.0.o.

Keith hadn’t really improved by the next couple of days. He slept some, he ate some, and his color and temperature seemed to be returning to normal. But he regarded everyone who came into the room with the wary stare of a cornered wild animal, and he still wasn’t speaking more than one or two words at a time, if that. Just as Shiro had feared, he had reverted back to the year that they had met, except worse. 

He tried to spend as much time in the infirmary with him as he could, hoping that the company would eventually coax him into relaxing. The other paladins still hadn’t gotten their chance to talk to him. Everyone, including Shiro, was afraid their presence would trigger another panic attack. He had already nearly gone into one when Hunk had delivered his breakfast that morning, and had been extra jumpy around Coran, too.

Shiro was eating his own breakfast, trying not to focus too much on the fact that Keith’s was just sitting there untouched, when he heard a telltale sniffle. Keith was sitting up, propped on some pillows against the wall, but his head was turned away from Shiro, as was pretty common. Even so, he could see the shimmer of a tear as it streaked down his face. Setting aside his bowl, he rounded the bed and settled down on the edge, expecting the flinch that followed but still hating it.

“Talk to me, Keith.”

He didn’t expect a response at all, and especially not a long one. But Keith angrily dashed the tears away, forever hating himself for ever crying, and spoke in a hoarse whisper. “Why didn’t you just leave me there?”

Shiro’s eyes widened. “What? Why?”

“I was almost _dead_ . It would have all been _over_. You should have just left me there.”

Heart aching, he scooted in closer, though Keith leaned even further back away from him. “Keith, _no_ . We don’t want you dead. We want you _here,_ alive and well, with us. If you died, I...I _thought_ you were dead, when I first saw you. And it was like...it was like my heart was being ripped out of my chest. I don’t know if I could survive it.”

Keith’s face, passive up until then, creased with a look of emotional pain that Shiro could hardly stand. “But why should I live? I’m...I’m _Galra,_ Shiro. I’m one of _them._ But not even really Galra, just some cross-breed freak of nature. I never should have existed. Maybe that’s why my mother walked out on me, she knew I was a freak and she couldn’t stand to -”

“Stop it. Keith, stop.” He grabbed his shoulder and shook it, not caring at the moment whether it startled him. “Don’t talk about yourself like that. You are not defined by who your parents or grandparents or anyone else were. You are you. You are Keith Kogane, Red Paladin of Voltron, best pilot at the Galaxy Garrison. You’re a survivor. You’re a fighter. Not because you have Galra blood, but because the universe has thrown every hard thing that it could think of at you and you’re still standing strong.”

“I’m _not_ standing strong, don’t you see me?” Keith met his eyes finally, a tiny bit of his old spark of anger visible. “I’m _pathetic._ Maybe I was the Red Paladin, maybe I was a survivor and a fighter, but right now I don’t think I can be any of those things. I don’t want to fight anymore, Shiro. I’m _tired_ of surviving. I just want…” He broke down into tears again, covering his face with his hands.

Moving over closer, Shiro wrapped his arms around his brother and pulled him in tight. “You want what?”

Keith’s shoulders shuddered beneath him. “I don’t want to be here. I don’t trust any of them. I _can’t_ trust any of them.”

“I know.” 

For a long time, they sat together like that, Keith’s face buried in Shiro’s chest while he cried out all his tears. Shiro ran his fingers through his hair, trying desperately to come with _anything_ he could say to comfort him. 

“Do you think you could listen to them, if they come and talk to you? Just one at a time, not everyone at once. I know they’re really anxious to speak to you, and I think it might do you some good, too.” Or at least he hoped.

It took him a minute to answer. “I don’t know.”

“Okay. Well, it doesn’t have to be now. But I’d like you to consider it.”

Keith just nodded.

.o.0.O.0.o.

He had been in bed for days. The infection was all but gone, there was no longer any danger in putting him in a pod, and doing so had been brought up a couple of times. But Shiro and Coran must have noticed how he shrank into himself every time it was mentioned, because they dropped the subject and just continued to let him stay there. 

He didn’t want to go in a pod. Being forced unconscious for who knew how many hours or days was just too _vulnerable_ , and he already felt that way far too much, anyway. After all, he was stuck in bed in the middle of a ship full of people who hated him. He was pretty confident that Shiro would try his best to protect him, and Coran might, too. The Altean had taken the time to sit down and apologize to him for his role in the whole mess, and based on the way he had been treating him Keith was fairly sure he could be trusted. 

But that left four others, all who had weapons, one of whom had some kind of weird magic and was literally connected to the Castle. He didn’t feel safe, and he _hated_ it. There hadn’t been many places in his life that he had been able to truly let down his guard and feel safe. A foster home or two, though later on he had become so jaded that even the good ones didn’t feel like they would last. The Garrison to some extent, at least as long as Shiro was there.

And the Castle. Yeah, there was always the chance of an attack, and there had been the couple of times that someone had snuck on board without them knowing. But in all of those situations he had known that there were people around who had his back, people that he could count on. It was the most at home he had felt since Shiro had left for Kerberos.

Now it was those very same people that he was afraid of, as stupid and weak as that made him. The thought was almost laughable. Him? Afraid of Lance, Hunk, and Pidge? But he couldn’t get the hatred he had seen in some of their eyes out of his head. Couldn’t forget the venom in their voices. Couldn’t erase all the times he had watched them, hallucinations or not, show up in that cave with insults on their lips and weapons in their hands, ready to make him pay for the crime of being part Galra.

He didn’t want to talk to them. But he knew that Shiro really wanted him to, and that meant he would have to do it sooner or later. Maybe if he went ahead and got it over with, they’d leave him alone more, and then when his leg was healed enough that he could actually walk it’d be easier to leave. He hadn’t figured out where he was going - definitely not back to Borulmyte - or how he’d get there, but leaving was the best option for everybody.

“Will you...stay? If I let them…”

Once again, Shiro knew exactly what he was talking about, despite the question being out of the blue. “Of course. I’ll be right here with you the whole time.”

Sinking back into the pillows, Keith hugged himself. “Okay.”

Shiro smiled softly. “Okay. I’ll send them a message and let them know you’re ready.”

Hunk was the first to come in. He burst into tears pretty much as soon as he walked through the door and saw Keith, and cried so much the whole time that his many, many apologies could barely be understood. It made Keith uncomfortable, if he was honest. He had never known how to deal with tears, his own or anyone else’s. But Hunk was so obviously genuine and straightforward, and he had always had a hard time believing that there was any part of such a loving person that could have held such malice. 

“I get it.” It took everything in him to force multiple words out, but he knew he had to this time. “It’s hard to...stand up. When...everyone else...disagrees. It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not okay, it’s so not okay!” Hunk blubbered. “I don’t know if it would have done any good for me to say anything or not, but I still should have done it.”

Keith nodded. “Okay. You’re right. It wasn’t okay. But…” He took a deep breath. “I forgive you.”

The way Hunk’s face lit up was totally worth the difficulty of saying the words. “Really, man? Thank you. Like, really, thank you, you don’t know how happy that makes me. I know we’ve never been, like, the best of friends, but I’ve always really wanted to get to know you better, I mean if you’d be okay with that, it’s totally up to you, but maybe sometime when you’re feeling better we can like, hang out? Also I know you haven’t been eating much right now but I am definitely making you brownies when you feel up to eating them. Like, a ton of brownies. All the brownies I can possibly make. Hey, maybe you could _help_ me make the brownies! Cooking is such a good way to bond, I can’t believe I haven’t thought of it before! What do you think, does that sound okay? Or I mean, if you really don’t want to hang out with me at all, I totally understand that, too, I just -”

“Hunk.” Keith’s lips twitched upward slightly as the breathless Yellow Paladin finally screeched to a halt. “Yeah. Sounds good.”

Hunk beamed. “Great! Okay, I’m gonna like, go, and let somebody else come in here, ‘cause, yeah. Feel better, Keith!”

When the room was empty again, Shiro leaned over and squeezed his hand. “How do you feel?”

“Good.” He was surprised to find it was actually pretty true. A small burden had been lifted from his chest.

“Good. You ready for Lance or Pidge?”  
  


Keith’s heart started beating double time again. “Lance.” Even though he had been more active in the process of his condemnation, Pidge’s response had hurt the worst.

The boy that came into the infirmary wasn’t the Lance that Keith knew. He couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off the floor, or his hands, or anything but Keith and Shiro, and when he spoke his voice was so soft it was barely audible. 

“I don’t know why I did it.” He picked at a loose thread on his jeans. “I just get...so emotional, so caught up in the moment sometimes...I’m really just as much of a hothead as you are.”

If his demeanor and apology hadn’t caught Keith’s attention, that statement did. Lance, admitting he was as bad as Keith at something? “Thought that was because...I’m _Galra._ ”

Lance’s face pinched. “Yeah. I said some pretty stupid things. I mean…” He shrugged. “Who knows, maybe it _is_ because you’re Galra. But still, it’s...you’re just you. And that’s okay. Maybe we don’t always get along, but I don’t _really_ think you’re evil. I mean, I guess I _kinda_ thought you could be. It was stupid, though. I’m an idiot, that’s what I’m getting at. There’s no real explanation, just...I’m sorry, like I said.”

Part of Keith wanted to accept that. Part of him didn’t think he could. “I...thanks. For apologizing. I think...maybe I can forgive you...soon? Maybe not yet. But, yeah. Soon.”

Lance nodded. “That’s fair. I didn’t really expect you to, like, at all, so…” He finally flicked his eyes up to meet Keith’s. “I think you and I could use to work on some things, anyway. Like, you know, not acting like we hate each other. Because I don’t. Hate you, that is. And I’m...pretty sure based on what Coran said that you don’t hate me, either.”

“No. I don’t. And yeah, that...that sounds good.”

“Okay. Good.” A brief smile flashed over his face, then he nodded again and excused himself.

“You still doing okay?”

Keith pressed his lips together. “Think so. I’m nervous, though. About Pidge.”

Shiro smiled sympathetically. “I know. Just give her a chance, ‘kay?”

Pidge shuffled into the room in a very similar fashion to Lance, eyes on the floor. She perched on the very edge of the chair that each paladin had occupied, kicking her feet back and forth since they didn’t quite touch the floor. In a low voice, she said her apology and explained that she had let her hurt over her family get the best of her, but insisted that it didn’t excuse her blaming him. 

It took a moment longer than the others for him to find his words. “I remember what it was like...missing somebody. Believing that they were still out there, but not knowing for sure. I mean, it wasn’t my actual _family_ ...unless you count my mom, which...at least I knew she _chose_ to leave. So, she’s...probably fine.” Just didn’t want him. “But Shiro is the closest thing I’ve had to family since...since my Pops. And it’s hard. I mean, I kinda went ballistic, broke into a commanding officer’s office, punched a bunch of other officers, and got kicked out of the Garrison.”

“You _what?_ ” Shiro broke in, sitting forward, then realized his interruption and sat back, waving a hand. “Never mind. Sorry. We’ll talk later.”

Pidge snickered a little, and Keith took that as encouragement to continue. “But, yeah. I know how hard it is, and I would never, _never_ wish that on someone else.”

Her head popped up, eyes wide and wet behind her glasses. “I know you wouldn’t. I know...I _know_ you didn’t have anything to do with it, I _never_ should have said something like that. You...you’re right, you understand probably more than anyone else, and I…” She trailed off, ducking her head as tears spilled down her cheeks.

Once again, there was someone crying in front of him, and he didn’t know what to do. But he was pretty sure what any of the other paladins would have offered in this situation, so… “Do you, um...need a...hug?”

The next thing he knew he had an armful of Pidge, curled up on the bed next to him and leaving tears and snot all over his shirt. He patted her back awkwardly. “You’ll find them. I know you will.”

“Why are _you_ comforting _me?_ I’m supposed to be in here helping _you_ to feel better, this is not how this is supposed to work!”

Keith frowned. “Um...sorry?”

Pidge glared at him, not at all intimidating with her sopping wet face. “ _No,_ don’t _apologize,_ that’s my job, too!” 

“Sorry!”

She punched him in the ribs. “You’re a good hugger. Why are you such a good hugger.”

Keith was just getting more confused the longer this conversation went on. “I...don’t know? It certainly isn’t from practice.”

Tilting her head back, she narrowed her eyes at him as if she could see into his mind. “Do you not like hugs?”

“No, I...do.”

“Then I’m gonna hug you. Every day. From now on.”

“Aw, can I get Keith hugs every day, too?” 

Keith startled a little bit when he realized that Hunk and Lance had returned to the room, but forced himself to relax. This was okay. They weren’t going to hurt him. They had all been very open with him, and even though it was going to take some time, he thought he could learn to trust them again.

“I...guess?”

“Yay!” Hunk settled onto the end of the bed, and Lance took the now empty chair, folding his long legs up into it. Shiro scooted forward again to be in Keith’s line of vision.

“How are you feeling now? Think maybe you can keep surviving a little longer?”

He felt Pidge tense in his arms, and Hunk’s face froze while Lance’s went carefully blank. Keith swallowed. “Yeah. I think...maybe I’m ready for that pod now. So I can finally get out of this bed and...I don’t know, kinda figure this out all over again.”

Shiro ruffled his hair fondly. “I’m glad. We’ll all be there with you for every step, okay?”

There was one more question, though. “What about Allura?”

Shiro’s face darkened slightly. “I’ve already told her she can either treat you the same as everyone else, or we’re leaving.”

“Nah, we won’t leave,” Pidge piped up. “There’s more of us than there are of her now. We’ll just stage a mutiny.”

Keith laughed awkwardly. “Somehow I don’t think that’ll be necessary.”

“I don’t think so, either, because I think she’ll come around,” Lance said. “But the point is, Mullet...we’re gonna support you.”

“You’re part of the Space Family now, dude!” Hunk cheered.

“Exactly,” Shiro smiled. “And Space Family has to stick together.”

The others kept chattering quietly, someone throwing in something about _“ohana”_ in a weird voice, which triggered a whole conversation about some movie that he didn’t care about keeping up with. Closing his eyes, Keith let his body truly relax for the first time since before going to the Blade. 

And he felt _safe._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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